By 
Nobody wants to suck. We don’t. We all wish we could be better versions of ourselves. But unfortunately, sucking is kind of our natural state, because our natural state is outdated by about 4 millennia. In our natural state, we’re about a step and a half ahead of your run-of-the-mill orangutan, and if dolphins had legs, they would have kicked our asses by now.
But we like to be in our natural state. It feels, well, natural. So instead of being superheroes that reach our actual potential, we spend most of our time wandering around, thoughtlessly seeking various forms of base pleasures like orgasms, sugar rushes, and empty-headed stimulation from awful TV. We don’t look within ourselves, or examine what we’re doing or why. We’re monkey children who sleepwalk through a good 90% of our lives, so we lack self-awareness, we don’t think critically, and we make the same mistakes over and over again.
This is nothing new. In fact, I kind of tend to never shut the fuck about this. I yammer on endlessly about living consciously. But what’s always been so difficult for me, and I think for most people, is the question of, “Okay, well how exactly do you do that?”
How do you always critically about everything? How do you force yourself to always seek the real truth of a situation before acting on it? How do you remember to not be a cro-magnum dipshit?
I think I’ve finally found an answer that should help. I call it “Reasonating.” Here’s how you Reasonate: Before you do anything–anything at all–say out loud what you’re doing and why.
It seems incredibly simple–too simple. And you’re probably thinking it won’t make a difference. And it will start off normally enough.
“I am waking up because I have to go to work to earn money so that I can have food and shelter.”
“I am eating eggs because I need sustenance to survive and I think eggs are good for me.”
“I am pooping into a toilet because otherwise, I’ll ruin everyone’s day who is around me.”
And you’ll be thinking, “This is stupid. I know how I live my life. I don’t need to do this.” But then eventually you’ll start a sentence with something like…
“I am Instagramming a carefully staged, selected, and edited picture of my face because…”
“I am screaming at my dog after that missed field goal because…”
“I just honked at and flipped off that old woman for driving too slow because…”
And then you’ll stop dead in your tracks. You’ll have to reevaluate who you are, and what you’re doing in your life. You’ll have no choice. You won’t want to hear yourself say:
“Because getting meaningless fake tokens of approval on this version of my face from people I don’t care about is how I feel valued.”
“Because I get angry when pro sports don’t go my way, because my life is devoid of real meaning and emotional investment, so I instead invest my emotions into how well the black dudes throw things.”
“Because honking makes me feel like somebody has to listen to me when I know nobody really wants to.”
And there. You’ve stopped. And suddenly you’re more aware of your own behavior. You’re forced to immediately confront yourself and what you do as you exist on this planet. And now you get the privilege of not doing any of that, and can move on to doing…oh God, absolutely anything else with your life.
This isn’t just about dumb shit like Instagram and football games. This is about constantly being aware of how you’re spending your time and energy. What are you doing? What is this contributing to your ultimate happiness? Anything? Are you going anywhere? Are you helping anyone? Are you helping yourself?
Or are you just being an unevolved drooling drone-like fucking idiot who can’t do anything right?
Reasonating is about you checking up on that. But simply doing this isn’t enough. There are three very simple rules in place to make sure this exercise is as effective as possible.
1. Your Reasons Must Be In Depth
“I am eating this box of Oreos because I want them.”
“I am quoting Anchorman to my friends because it’s fun.”
“I am binging on House Hunters because it makes me happy.”
Anything this simple does not count. “Because I want to,” “Because it’s what people do,” “Because I feel good when I do it.” Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. If you allow your reasoning to be this simple, you can get away with anything.
“I am shooting heroin because it makes me happy.”
“I am running over stray dogs because I want to.”
“I am organizing a cross burning on the Jackson’s lawn because it’s fun.”
So a single, simple reason isn’t sufficient. You need to explore what your reason means. Get in depth with it too. Don’t just be honest with yourself. Be tough. Be a dick.
“I am eating this box of Oreos because I have a hole in my heart that needs to be filled with corn syrup, but I should really seek something else to eat, and look to fill the void in a healthier way.”
“I am quoting Anchorman because I believe the best way to get people to like me is to show them that I know something that someone else said, but this is symptomatic of me not thinking that my actual thoughts are interesting enough to share, soshouldn’t I work on that?”
“I am marathoning House Hunters because I’m too afraid to live in the horror known as reality right now. But reality is goingto be out there regardless of what I do, so I should stop being such a coward, and besides these assholes care way too much about having a double vanity in their en suite.”
2) If Your Reason Sucks, Don’t Do It
Okay so maybe you fully realize why you do most things, and then you just do them anyway, cause fuck it.
I know I do this all the time. I’ll say to myself, “I am taking Sporcle quizzes because retesting my knowledge of the top five scorers on every NBA team during the 90’s is easier than creating something by confronting the monster that is my own brain, and I prefer taking the easier option because I’m a piece of shit destined not to contribute a thing to the world.”
And then I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing–like nothing is wrong!
There are a few ways to attack this. One is the marvel that is self-hate. That will hopefully push you more towards doing the right thing. You can also try doing the right thing because you take pride in yourself. At least, that seems like it would work. I don’t know for sure. I haven’t tried it myself (more of a self-hate junkie), but it makes sense.
3. If You Can’t Figure Out Your Reason, Don’t Do It
Now I know what you’re thinking. “But if people need to justify everything they do, then stupid people who have never justified anything will be left paralyzed for the rest of their lives, peeing their pants, and starving to death.” Yeah, I know. You’re welcome.
This is important. When we live consciously, we’re more connected to everything–most importantly ourselves. If we’re constantly forced to justify ourselves, we will be more cognizant of our actions, and we will live more consciously. It is only then that we can stop reacting with emotion over logic, mindlessly stuffing our mouths with starch and oil, and taking pictures of our own stupid faces.
Many think they’re already living consciously, but most aren’t, and there’s a reason. It’s really, really, really fucking hard. It’s hard to take your brain off of auto-pilot and remember how to fly the damn thing yourself. But reasonating is a great way to force yourself into a life of consciousness. It’s the best way I know to start diagnosing yourself as afraid, lazy, shitty–all of the things you totally are.
And it’s the best way I know to hold yourself accountable to change.
You’ll still make mistakes all the time. You’ll lie to yourself, you’ll fail to see your real reasons for doing things, and you’ll find new inventive ways to fuck up, because you’re you, and it’s what you’ve done for your whole life now.
But hopefully you’ll make fewer mistakes, and with the ones you’ll make you’ll be able to stand by them a little more. And sure you’ll get some weird looks in the office when you’re walking to the bathroom saying “I am about to pee because my bladder is full and holding it distracts me from life and is bad for my body!” But at least as you’re sitting down to pee (if you’re a woman, or a weird dude) you’ll be able yell at the top of your lungs, “I know why I’m doing this! I am connected to myself and therefore the world!”
